In the Quest Of Love and Peace

You keep returning
Like an almost extinguished flame.
You lit me up.
Ablaze-
The black hole flickers in my womb,
Before erupting.


My lips part
Blow you in smoke.
The veins soothe
As their shadows rest in my eyes
To come back into life
There
Right there
Where
You reside
O Flame!

Prayers and cries
Blend
Consummate
Conjugate
To give you a thorny glow.

An incandescence par brilliance
Gallops through an unending tunnel:
Green springs to life
A poet is born.

Fumes germinate in your seeds,
Sprouting love
You pollinate my civilisation.

Your serenity ripples through an ocean of clouds
As the planets wait,
Around a ghastly bonfire,
With bated breath.

My love,
You breathe
Meaning into meaninglessness.
You make every chaos strike a balance
You bridge the seas with care
Guarding Moses' trails.

Every cell of this universe
Every wave of the ocean
Every bed of pearls and corals
Every successive phase of consciousness-
Lose their names and forms.
Arrivals and departures
Dissolve
In the untorn cord of the womb
As you realise your immortality
In harmony
In synthesis
In love.

Finally, I rest on my laurels

Scared of death all my life, for the first time I have geared up the courage to face it and accept it from the front. I have learned to believe that souls never die. They just shed their adult body to move on to another lifetime, which we call death.

 Our life is much more than just living. We learn to be patient, to trust, to forgive, to love, to accept, to shed off jealousy, disbelief, resistance, lust and greed and finally cleanse our souls in the 'space between lives'...

 ...A knowledge as profound as it can be and more than that. 

 My anxieties, panic attacks and fear have finally started to cease. The new insight into life and lifetimes helped me stand my ground, though bruised nad battered at times, but triumphant always!

Today I can forgive all of them who have hurt, sometimes beyond my limits of endurance too. I can be patient when things go downhill. I can love unconditionally.

And most significantly, I am not disquieted by death anymore.

I knew it to be the biggest truth of life but found it hard-bitten to accept.

 But not anymore. I am not hard up any longer for courage and vigour. I know the key.

ROOTLESS: The man who traded his soul

 

Meandering clouds, undulating-
Volcanoes...
Through a streamlined city.

 

 

Hive of memories, packed tight-
Seethes
Caught in a web.

 

 

Scarred and shrivelled clouds, long unattended guests-
Writhes
In your muddy lungs that stink.

 

 

An enticing river, moaning-
Incubates
Within your brain, a host of angels.

 

 

A monstrous armour, camouflage-
Swallows up
The existence of your soul.

 

 

Cradled in evil, a visionary pauper
Smokes up
An avalanche of dreams.

MOON

She glides through the womb of clouds
Plays hide and seek
with tonight's mother
 Her halo ramifies
Blurs the expanse of sky.

The earth- a silent observer
Bows down
In awe for the reverend.


The cool breeze blows over my face
Prepares this mortal
To witness
The birth
Of universe's child.


Above
In the ocean of space
The progenitor disperses
Making room
for the illuminator.


My moon.

PATNA DIARY

A thick blanket of heavy cloud hangs, as if enveloping the entire runway. Stars like lights, inside and outside the aircraft. A stretch of yellow line on the flight strip separates the zones of airlines, as if different solar systems orbiting within their confines.

As the plane takes off and I get elevated to God’s kingdom, the earthly clouds, which the blades of the plane slice through, the stars and their abode, seem to have exchanged places with my city beneath. A cluster of lights.Of stars.

The journey that I am making now, made last week and will be making for the following few weeks, is not merely professional. For me, this terse absence from my city of joy, from the people I know, is a magic potion that aids me to take refuge in a faraway city among unfamiliar people. It is an elixir that heals my antsy mind. The bud within opens up into full bloom. This journey is not just an evasion from the city but a serendipitous encounter with my lost self, an opportunity to regurgitate.

It’s been long since I have heard my voice. My inner voice. The relentless cacophony around have long deafened, dumbed and blinded my senses.

When I am on the clouds, fetid vapours emit from a smoked up heart. They hang in front, clouding my eyes; their claws intertwining with those of the sooty clouds outside, till I have been completely enshrouded and ingurgitated and devoured.

Moments pass by. Moments, dragged beyond a clock’s ability, fleet away. I open my eyes. To a new world. Ahead. A sunnier world.

And lo! When the clock strikes seven on the dial, the sky bifurcates- the sun on my left, yellowing its share of the skyspace and the moon on my right, scattering its pearls around. A divine sight that no god-forsaken mortal could witness.

No solar system, no milky way could rear a groom more powerful than the sun and a bride more angelic than the moon. The knightly clouds stand as guards of honour as the groom kisses the bride. The sparks from the constellations echo through the universe, ricocheting in countless milky ways. The newlyweds consummate as the infinitesimal world snows under the trivialities of life.

But this lonely wanderer, stand the sole witness to a celestial conjugation, the thirst of my eyes quenched.

As I spread my vision across the unending expanse, I find the vapour missing, the sooty smoke absent and my vision clearer than never before.

My watch says one hour twenty five minutes since boarding, that is twenty five minutes since the starry wedding and here I am, on the runway of Patna airport.

A fuller, more content Debarati, signing off.

Madness

Inexplicable
my feelings;

Unfathomable
my love;

The pain of a throb
hearts the rip apart;

A life
unthinkable to traverse
without
overstepping
the footsteps
of one's own 
oneself;

A madness
deluges;

A wait
infinite;

An adrenaline
veins through,
scathes.

'Madness in the brain is caused by infinity in the heart'.

Naked Dreams: DELUSION

Naked Dreams: DELUSION

DELUSION

Funny

When people err

And

Oblige you

With

Their

Greatness.

REFLECTION

Labyrinthine ideas

Eluding images

Awaiting thoughts

Surreptitious

Me-a shuttlecock.

OBSESSION

Gurgling images

Thoughts-a waterfall

Honking

Of a blurry stream of consciousness

A silent obsession

I born.

THE BRAIN

Pause

Pose

O controlador
The invincible lynchpin
Of life

Flaunt
Your indomitable power

The shutterbugs
are ready.

GOD'S WIT

Clothesline
hung
on
lifeline

Rain,
pierce
my sky

O this insane
Adonai's
turmoils
inside out.

DEFEASANCE

She wanted to see the green leaves on the home-side tree all throughout the year

Through all her life.

This has been her only source of strength

Her reflection.

At every daybreak 

She would look out of her bedroom window 

To restore the serenity of her conscience.

They were, satiating her desire, 

All these decades, 

Prior to this.

She dashed to her old friend, the bright green life bearers

When she awakened this morning

But the leaves had turned yellow

Sordid 

Soiled 

Devoid of life

Her life

Destitute of everything she stood for...

And she knew it was time

Time for her perennial and irremediable perdition!

DUEL

Meaningfulness and meaninglessness

Play a pitched battle

Of harmony.